Why Is It So Hard To Watch ‘How I Met Your Mother’ Now?

How I Met Your Mother was one of the flagship sitcoms on television during its run from 2005 to 2014, becoming such a cornerstone of pop culture that otherwise insignificant items like a yellow umbrella or words like “legendary” are still strongly associated with the comedy. Thanks to its charismatic cast of characters and its playful use of unreliable narrators through a storytelling perspective, the show garnered wide acclaim and even set the groundwork for a spin-off series almost a decade after its finale. All that praise being said, How I Met Your Mother has fallen into the same pitfalls that many sitcoms have aged into, making it difficult for audiences to return to the series and even more challenging for new viewers to attempt to dive into the show.

So, what is making such a popular sitcom so hard to watch now? A combination of unfunny jokes, narrative arcs without payoff, and the overall unlikability of the characters has become more apparent in the years since we last saw the gang sitting around the booth at MacLaren’s Pub, making the once beloved How I Met Your Mother a remnant of flawed television history.

‘How I Met Your Mother’s Humor Is Outdated and Offensive

Outdated humor from an older sitcom isn’t a new revelation for television fans. However, How I Met Your Mother stands out for its relatively modern feel that is still rife with jokes that wouldn’t be acceptable today, nor should they have ever been. The laundry list of problematic jokes is extensive, in part due to the show’s commitment to long-running gags and callbacks. You can start with Ranjit (Marshall Manesh), the friend group’s favorite cab driver who was often diminished to a gag character with inconsistencies in his ethnic background that only served to perpetuate racially insensitive stereotypes. Ranjit was introduced as being from Bangladesh, but given an Indian name and spoke Farsi, lumping together characteristics from different groups simply to amplify the mysteriously foreign taxi driver character trope. That’s not even touching the problematic Season 9 episode, “Slapsgiving 3: Slappointment In Slapmarra,” that featured the predominantly white cast dressed up in caricatured Chinese costumes and mocking accents.

Racial insensitivity was not the extent of How I Met Your Mother‘s poor choice of humor. Throughout the seasons, there were numerous jokes that were homophobic, slut-shaming, and generally misogynistic. Even if many of these jokes were meant to be brief comments or standalone bits, their constant presence in the series only serves to preserve those problematic ways of thinking, normalizing them rather than calling them out and correcting them.

‘How I Met Your Mother’s Ted and Barney Are Wildly Problematic

And now into some even bigger issues. Though How I Met Your Mother‘s cast is truly an endearing group of misfits played by phenomenally talented actors, it also boasts two of the most problematic characters on television: Barney Stinson (Neil Patrick Harris) and Ted Mosby (Josh Radnor). While anyone who’s seen even a glimpse of an episode likely understands why the womanizing Barney is controversial, others may be surprised to realize that Ted could be just as bad, if not worse at times. But let’s start with the big one: Barney, the Playbook, and a list of rightfully angry women.

Barney is a chronic and manipulative womanizer who is played as comedic relief to the group, as they seem to forgive his blatant sexism, misogyny, and borderline (if not actual) sexual assault. One of the essential aspects of his character is his intelligent deceit and storytelling to persuade women to sleep with him; something he was so proficient in that he developed a Playbook chock-full of schemes that mentally and emotionally manipulated countless women, and even his closest friends. He would assume false identities, fake his own death, pursue vulnerable women, and constantly record his sexual endeavors without their consent. That’s right, Barney had secret cameras installed in his bedroom that he references multiple times, only for it to be played off as a joke rather than being met with outrage and lawsuits. Though his character does demonstrate growth and change in the series, his constant backsliding into sociopathic behavior and general inability to keep it in his pants makes him feel like more of a warning sign to women, rather than the lovable flirty guy in a friend group. Barney does make a cameo appearance in Season 2 of How I Met Your Father, where his womanizing ways are being treated with more seriousness in the form of a shock collar calibrated to zap him every time he utters something misogynistic. Overdue, but well deserved.

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And now on to Ted. Ted was supposed to be the hopeless romantic of the group, our lovable protagonist whom we earnestly support in his goal of meeting the One. That’s what he should have been, but over the course of How I Met Your Mother, he himself has done things on par with some of Barney’s worst moments. He has cheated on his girlfriend, is obsessive and pushy towards many of his romantic interests, and is constantly removing accountability from his own shoulders. The phrase may have not been as prevalent when the series aired, but viewers today are surely quick to call out Ted on his “pick-me” and “nice guy” behavior. His actions feel hollow because of his self-aggrandizing and lack of responsibility, always putting the blame on others instead of himself. He laments not finding his true love, but there are nine seasons of television that prove that maybe he wouldn’t even be deserving of someone as good as he pictures. Ted’s “woe-is-me” attitude is only highlighted more and more with each failed relationship and each bad decision he partakes in or enables in his friends. For someone who claims to be such a good guy, he’s done his fair share of bad things and not taken it upon himself to make them right.

The Infamous Ending of ‘How I Met Your Mother’

There’s one other elephant in the room as to why HIMYM is so difficult to return to, as any fan who watched the notorious series finale is likely still holding onto some resentment for the way the show concluded. After nine years of build-up and almost a decade of character development, viewers finally got to see how Ted met Tracy McConnell (Cristin Milioti), the Mother. We got to see glimpses of their whirlwind romance, finally completing the family picture that had been missing an important piece since Ted first started this story with his two kids in their living room. Robin (Cobie Smulders) and Barney had just gotten married, Marshall (Jason Segel) and Lily (Alyson Hannigan) were building their family, and Ted finally got his girl. And then it was all gone.

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In the ending moments of the series, Tracy is shown to pass away from a disease; Ted is telling his children this story to connect them to their mother who was gone. And if that wasn’t enough, Barney and Robin had divorced and separated. Despite seasons’ worth of on-screen buildup, growth for each of their characters, and the entirety of the final season being centered around their wedding, they too did not get a happily ever after. The narrative payoff for these series-spanning arcs was thrown away just as they were given to audiences. Ted’s children encourage him to pursue Robin again, which he does despite years spent shifting his narrative away from his once girlfriend. So much time was spent giving Barney the blessing to improve himself and be with Robin, yet it all felt meaningless because she still ended up with Ted in the end. Fans to this day still hold bitterness at this ending, and rightfully so.

The way a series ends isn’t just important for giving characters a happy ending for the sake of a happy ending, but to give viewers satisfaction and happiness for completing this journey alongside their characters. As creatively written and addictive as the series is, it’s hard to re-watch, knowing that the ending feels meaningless and the growth of many of the major characters feels reduced and diminished. How I Met Your Mother has some fantastic writing, an endearing cast, and a buffet of iconic phrases and imagery. But in 2024, that might not always be enough to cover up the problematic humor and the still-infamously controversial ending.

How I Met Your Mother is available to stream on Hulu in the U.S.

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